( http://www.scr-awards.com/ceremony/index.html)

The Event: Obviously, to start the process some candidate has got to get into his/her first 8-way formation. Only SCR holders may participate in this ceremony.

Prerequisites: The candidate who has just qualified for the award is sent to the store to buy beer - two cases. One to wear and one to drink. Buying really cheap beer to wear is

Tuna's SCR Ceremony

acceptable. Buying cheap beer for the rest of us is NOT. And, if the candidate should bring back two cases of cheap beer, he or she will find themselves wearing both cases and be sent back to the store.

Moderator: By now the novice has returned with the beer. The crowd is getting restless and its time to start the ceremony. But first, the moderator must be selected. This is normally the SCR holder with the lowest number, or as I like to be called, "the ranking'est" or "rankest" SCR holder. In the meantime, the crowd is "clumsy" dropping and kicking full beer cans all over the place in preparation for the ceremony. Once the lowest number moderator is selected, she or he will shout, "Bring on the neophytes and assume the position!"

Candidate: The candidate must kneel in the center of the SCR holders facing West (if the candidate doesn't face West on their own, well then the moderator and other SCR holders get ugly with the candidate).

Moderator: Usually asks the candidate if they know why they are facing West. And, when the candidate says, "No!" the moderator explains, "The reason you are facing West kid is because about 400 years ago, a bunch of jumpers in California formed the world's first 8-man star. You'll notice I said, 8-MAN star, no women at all - it was eight real men who first done it out in California and that's why we face West. To pay tribute to them folks out West who done it first."

Its at this point that the moderator usually explains about the early 8-ways and how Bob Buquor drowned on his ill-fated camera jump. Before presenting the "trophies" you are ready to sing the hymn of praise for his or her accomplishment. If its just one guy, then Him (Hymn) works fine. If its more than two folks then you sing "THEM" instead of the hymn. And if its only a lady, you sing a HER instead of a Him (Hymn).

HIM--HIM, F*** (rhymes with duck) HIM - and the POURING begins. About the time the candidate thinks all the beer is poured over them, the moderator will ask, "IS IT OVER?!?!?!?" And the crowd says, NO!!!!!!! And the dunking begins again (this can go on for four or five waves).

The finale is the candidate has to clean up the empty beer cans. Of course, one of the cans must always be prominently displayed in the candidate's house.